Kingdom Lifestyle

THE SPIRIT IS WILLING BUT THE FLESH IS WEAK: A HOLY SPIRIT CONVICTION

Stay awake and pray, so that you won’t enter temptation. The spirit is willing, but the flesh is weak

MATTHEW 26:41

Ever since I’ve had a divine encounter with God, I have really been in my bible. Studying hard to get my life aligned with the narrow path. I stopped consuming sexual and immoral music on a regular basis. I have given up about 99% of my foul language. One percent being the occasional slip up. I even decided to give my body as a living sacrifice to the Lord vowing to remain pure until my Kingdom husband is presented to me. I mean, seeing the transformation and the work I have been putting in has made me proud of the changes that have manifested in my life. All glory being to God because I couldn’t have done it on my own. It never fails that when I feel ready to boast in my accomplishments, the good Lord knows when it’s time to humble me and let me know I’m not quite where I need to be just yet. It was after watching the movie American Skin, I realized that I have more internal work that needs to be done. 

Thank God we are not saved by works but by faith but at this point I would have failed miserably. If you haven’t watched the movie I advise you to watch it before continuing this article because I am going to try my best not to reveal too much but I’m sure there will be a few spoilers.

American Skin, written and produced by the handsome Nate Parker, is about the retaliation of an ex marine who loses his son to gun violence by the hands of the police. Now, going into this movie I had no clue what it was about. I just saw a tweet by Jackie Hill Perry talking about how good it was. I saw Nate Parker in the promo picture and I was sold. I’ll watch that man do nothing in a movie if I had to. Excuse my flesh; I’m working on it.

 Now, of course, the movie started off sad but as the movie progressed I found myself just getting angrier and angrier internally. When I tell you my faith was being tested and I failed miserably. I am not joking. I was calm in the beginning but then I got to the parts that really just rang truth on what goes on in the world and I could no longer hold my anger in check.

There was a part where I could do nothing but cry because I’m a prophetic person so I feel emotions deeply and intensely. The world would call me an “empath”. So, when they were saying there is nothing that can be done, I thought to myself, wait you are an ex marine…. AN EX INFANTRY MARINE and there is nothing that can be done? OH THERE IS SOMETHING THAT CAN BE DONE!!!

Then there was another part in the movie when there was outrage and riots going on in the town and the chief of police went to the mother’s house asking her to do a press conference to help them stop the riots right after she had just got a verdict that they won’t be inditing the officer who killed her son. I don’t think I’ve ever yelled the F-bomb so loud in my life. One of the characters in the movie was being disrespectful and demeaning to the chief of police during this particular scene and I found myself being happy that he was expressing himself that way. I won’t even get on the rolling of the eyes and responses being yelled at the officers and their commentary. 

Then of course I felt the conviction of the Holy Spirit. I had to shift to a Kingdom perspective. What would I have done if I were in that situation. Us Christians are called to be set apart. To be the example of peace through all adversity. To love in spite of wrongdoings. Trample the lion and the serpent. Not to retaliate but to forgive as Joseph forgave his brothers for selling him into slavery. Could I have done that? 

This reminds me of the Botham Jean case in Dallas, Texas. The family of Botham were devout Christians and decided to publicly forgive the police officer who claims she accidently killed him. His brother hugged her and told her she is forgiven and there was so much outrage about them doing that. This happened in my BS days (before salvation) so I agreed with everyone else on how crazy they were for being so forgiving. However, being deeper in the word of God and having a deeper relationship with Him made me realize the reason why they decided to forgive, therefore, I had to repent for judging them the way I did.

Friends do not avenge yourselves; instead, leave room for God’s wrath, because it is written, vengeance belongs to me; I will repay, says the Lord.

ROMANS 12:19

My reactions to this movie definitely didn’t display one who follows Christ and I honestly can not answer the question on what I would currently do in the situation. I can definitely tell you that it would be an intense internal battle. My spirit wants to say I would walk the Christian way and do what is right but my flesh…….. WHEW! Now I see the true definition of dying to the flesh daily.

I just continually pray that I would never have to come upon a situation like that. This movie made me realize I’m far from perfect and that I still have growing to do. If you haven’t watched American Skin I highly recommend you check it out.

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